Sunday, September 9, 2012

Non Serviam

I was thinking about a gal I had a relationship with years ago that I'll dub as "Amy" here.  I shared a few thoughts with a good friend and his wife while talking about women I dated over the years, and why my proverbial red flag radar was now permanently up. 

I have never married, and will for all of my life never take the plunge and tie the knot with an Ameriskank.  I do proudly state that.  I could say marriage is for suckers and leave it at that, but over the years watching marriages either turn sour or gradually unravel made me cold.  As a youth, I swore that if I ever made serious vows to one woman I would devote myself to someone worthwhile.  Obviously, that woman never arrived, and I did not want to make the same mistakes I saw in either marital "bliss" turned to failure, or those marriages tattered and worn. None are perfect, but there you go.

Over time, I've seen Ameriskank behavior has gotten worse.  Granted, I am from the women are women camp, but variances, cultural decay, and memes do make a difference.   It's not a matter of, "You haven't found the right woman yet"---which mostly comes from women who believe they mean well.  NAWALT aside for a moment, even someone with similar, complementary attributes has not shown me consideration in the long haul.  And I am done with hearing that's all our fault for not attracting the rights ones, especially in an era of rampant hypergamy.  Just looking at the dating pool a(s of late) would have filled me with dread when I was a romantic teen.  It's a source for my grim aloof demeanor, and even though I'm not a complete introvert, it has turned me into a distant cynic.

Amy, of course, was the final nail in the coffin.  I dated her for the longest time, because I believed she was making progress with herself.  She even wanted to prove herself worthy to me, something that had not always happened in a while with my foibles with women in the past.  It was impressive at first, and she was fairly attractive and affectionate during our first year together.  It was almost like we were married, and when everything went grey---and then ugly in the last four months---it was also like a soiled marriage ending in wreckage. And Amy treated it as such. 

It was hard to tell who the "real" Amy was; either a warm and almost bubby, voluptuous, girly-girl like woman . . . that would become a brooding, quick to anger spoiled brat that would get drunk and stoned while making various threats.  It was to the point where I thought I would have to literally restrain her during her worse bouts.  Considering that if the cops were called on us, I'm sure I would be the one arrested despite being on the physical defense. Amy pushed and emotionally bullied, and I stood my ground as she resented me.  She resented me for not being a pushover and independent, the very qualities she was attracted her to me in the first place.  I was her alpha with bad boyish appeal.  Now I was her nemesis because I would not bow down on hand and knee. 

Her idea, eventually, was to domesticate me---but what that really entailed was to lick her self-inflicted wounds, be a lap dog,  and a sounding board.  Before, for the longest time, I was respected and even rather lionized.  When it slowly came to the fore that she wanted a man that was part pack mule, part counselor, I became disgusted and upset.  She knew way beforehand what I was like, and that it would not make me happy in a relationship whatsoever. 

I swore a covenant to myself that I would never seriously get involved with an "Amy" again.  I did date.  I had FWB situations.  But anyone who reassembled her was immediately passed up.

It has come to the point where I really believe that Ameriskanks feel like their self-entitlement includes that men have to feel happy to succor to them---although we dare not look like we are kow towing too much.  If all men are dogs to a skank, kicking a lowly dog for misbehavior and watching it cower even more is weakness in their minds.  Yet, on the converse, a dog who snarls back after continued abuse is somehow a dangerous threat. 

Ameriskanks know very little balance in relationships towards men, it is often close to an all or nothing affair.  It has often been stated a truly healthy man ready for a commitment is neither Caspar Milquetoast or a brute, but since AWs make poor decisions in mate selection (and blame men often for the blunders and ruination of a pairing, anyway), an AW will rarely heed for what is good for them in men. 

And it's little surprising when they find more men are not willing to submit to the act of marriage.  By its very action, kneeling and presenting a wedding ring is a sign of submission; it is a man yielding, even giving up his freedom in a symbolic and very real sense.   It makes it even more precarious and ominous in light of the fact women have the power of the state to decimate what a man has built with her over the years.  Don't even get me started about accusations and custody battles. 

There are a growing number of us not being happy at all with the AW desire to have the veto power above men sans accountability, and it is to their own damn determent that they refuse to acknowledge this and the societal implications.